Joanne Musgrave

Apparently Lego have released a girl friendly range and Twitter & Facebook is buzzing with hatred. Personally I don’t see the problem. Since all Lego seem to do these days is sell kits with all the right pieces to put together, why does it matter that some are geared towards girls?

Whatever happened to the days when you just had a pile of building blocks and you used your imagination to build something? Now it’s all planned out and all you’re doing is putting it together – like a 3D jigsaw puzzle.

This week, Gerry Harvey announced that he didn’t expect to make any money from his Harvey Norman Big Buys, or if it did, very little. Do you want a little hint on why that is? You’re flogging cheap crap not associated with your brand and you’re trying to take on the #1 online retailer in Australia at their own game, but with inferior wares.

I actually had someone write to me this week asking if I could get a particular Lock & Lock product in stock – they’d seen it at Harvey Norman Big Buys, but wanted to shop with me instead.

I also get plenty of people wanting Thermos products that are discounted elsewhere, but our customer service is trusted and we’re a well respected brand who give to the community and are concerned about people’s health & wellbeing.

I must be doing something right ……. Gerry, do you want some pointers?

Read more ….

Apparently in T-80 minutes, the rapture is going to happen. Judgement day is 21st May, 2011. Being an Athiest, thankfully, I’ll be staying behind with my loving husband and 3 border collies to live the rest of my life without people knocking on my door telling me I’m a sinner. 

Some enterprising Athiests in America have set up a service where they’ll come to your house, post-rapture, and collect your pets and take care of them here on earth after you’ve moved on to the next life. Eternal Earthbound Pets charge a very reasonable $135 for your first pet and $20 for each additional pet. So far, 259 people have signed up, so that’s a nice $35k for making a website that I’m guessing won’t have to deliver on it’s service. I must admit I’m impressed by the idea and dumbfounded that people actually signed up.

If you can’t take your pets to the next life, it does make me wonder ……. do you get to take your clothes? Can you pack a bag for travelling and fill a thermos with some chicken noodle soup in case you get a little peckish?

Read more about it at news.com.au.

Announced today, Nestle are buying out Jenny Craig.  Here’s my own spin on their reasoning.

REASON 1?
Be the cause of obesity, the cure & the relapse. A never ending cycle of up & down, of which the same company owns both!!

REASON 2?
Nestle have seen junk food companies go bust due to lack of diversity – Krispy Kreme comes to mind. They’re doing a ‘McDonalds’ and offering a healthy option, diet.

REASON 3?
To plug their ‘eating chocolate in moderation is healthy’ stance so they can continue to flog chocolate to fat people with no money.

Full story here.

My toes curled while hearing about Carrie Bickmore telling Americans that business people and the ‘girls’ pop in to hip places called McCafes which are ‘a little bit fancy’. As a pre-promote for Oprah’s ‘wildly sponsored’ tour down under, it’s a big giant fucking surprise that McDonalds are one of the sponsors.

Do we really think the average Australian is THAT stupid?

Read more at The Drum

There’s talks of banning smoking in ALL public places in NSW & VIC. Bring it on. I can’t stand walking in and out of shopping centres or standing in line at an ATm only to have to walk through a layer of smoke to do so. It’s disgusting and unhealthy and should be banned in all public places.

Read more here

The owners of www.themummytree.com.au need a good slap as far as I’m concerned. This morning, they went on Sunrise to be interviewed about helping mums start their own business. Instead of actually HELPING anyone, they sat there, looking like stunned mullets and read off a script. It sounded like an infomercial to flog their eBook.

Kochie called them on it and actually ASKED them for one of the free tips, not just to flog their eBook. These women are supposed to be giving advice to people about starting up a small business, yet they only seemed in interested in helping their own. Just pathetic ladies. Seriously.

Because of this, Karma (or stupidity) got them good! After the show was on, their website was down, and now I’ve gone and looked and their website’s hosting account has been suspended, I’m assuming due to them using their bandwidth limit for the month, or possibly for not warning their hosting company about the increased traffic and they pulled the site because it kept crashing the server and affecting 20 or 30 other businesses.

If you’re giving advice to people about how to run a business, how ’bout getting your own in order first……………………

Want some tips? Here’s a few of mine, and their FREE. I’m not selling anything.

1. Their big free tip was to stand out from the crowd. I’m assuming they meant a unique product. While this is one tactic, you really just need to be better at marketing your brand than your competitors.
2. Start up funds – you have to SPEND money to make money. If you don’t put some money aside for your start up & draw up a budget, you will fail.
3. Marketing budget – if you’re setting up an online shop, if you’re relying on free search engine results for your sales, you will fail. You need a monthly ad budget and you need to factor it in to your profit/loss.
4. Don’t be a tight arse – if you design your own logo, cheap out on your website, or heaven forbid, the manufacturing of your product, you’ll look dodgy and fail. If you’re going to be like this, go set up an eBay store.
5. Your suppliers are your lifeline – whether it’s a manufacturer or a distributor, forge relationships with your suppliers. It can mean the difference between success & failure.
6. Find a mentor – if you’re new to all this, find yourself a mentor. Perhaps the community forum section of The Mummy Tree might actually help you with this one. Learn from others mistakes, swap ideas with people you’re not in direct competition with.
7. Most successful businesses are set up because of some kind of passion or skill. Shop Naturally became the huge success it is because I had an interest in the products & my skills as a professional web designer meant I could out market all of the competition. Find your passion and your skill to start your business around.

Harsh? Perhaps yes, but pardon me for being annoyed at two self-serving women with a free story on one of Australia’s highest rating shows who were more concerned with helping themselves and not others, and who were too stupid to take proper advantage of the golden egg that is a story on Sunrise. Watch for yourself and see if you don’t agree with me.

What is it with men & the cloth and pornography? Now Fred Nile has been tangled up in a porn scandal. Click here for the story. Aren’t these people supposed to hold themselves to a slightly higher standard for their lord and saviour?

Just when I was getting some decent rankings for the phrases water bottle and water bottles with Google, some idiot throws a water bottle at Justin Bieber at a concert and now when you type water bottle in to Google, 3 of the top 10 spots are about it. Just in case you’re interested, you can watch the YouTube video here, very unspectacular!

When is that kids fame going to end? Between that and all this Twilight bullshit, I feel ancient! I had the misfortune of watching about 5 minutes of it on Foxtel the other night, oh my god, worst acting ever……..

For those who know me, I love all things Wil Anderson. He’s one funny bastard. Even better, The Gruen Transfer, whihc combines my love of Wil Anderson’s sense of humour, Andrew Denton’s brain, and advertising.

I haven’t had a chance to watch this week’s episode yet, but should to tomorrow. One of my favourite parts of the show is The Pitch, where an ad agency get to make an ad for something fake. No-one yet has managed to top the very first one in Season 1 Ep 1.

Enjoy.

My personal fave (above)

The best fake ad that could actually be used (and to think I sell reusable shopping bags online!)